Note: I wrote this piece in a spur of a moment while I was waiting for a friend at the Columbus Circle Mall, New York. I might sound entitled and judgemental, but I decided to not appease its scolding demeanor and leave these thoughts in their raw honest form. Re-reading them, reminds me just how much my views have changed over time.

Time before money

Many wonder why I made the decision to switch jobs, if that meant repaying my sign in and my relocation bonuses, or giving up 120k of stock awards. I made this decision without overthinking it - it was a decision based on pure instinct. They say that the best choices in life are made in a split second, and I agree - at least in this case. I know friends who hate their jobs, but the anticipation of the end-of-year bonus is a lock-in strong enough to make them endure long hours. I have other friends who hang on to the prospect of an upcoming promotion to induce themselves some excitement about their jobs. The paradox: all those people are just fresh out of college, where they were taught that passion is key to success, that if you don’t enjoy what you do, you should find something else. They dispose of immense creative talent that can be honed to build the world of the future. And, they find themselves blocked in dark spots and guided by short-term thinking. If we take a look at the statistics, realistically speaking, a bonus, or any company award whatsoever , is in the 20k - 80k range. At the risk of being labeled as “pretentious” - which I couldn’t care less about - I claim that 80k is an insignificant amount of money in today’s world. One can spend 80k per year easily by just ordering an extra desert for every meal they eat in the “metropolitan city of NY”. How does this amount of money even compare to the expected value that a young person’s talent, a graduate from an Ivy League, promises?

Of course, the risk is high. One such person can quit their 9-to-5, or better 8-2am job to start a business or join a startup, or write a book. But, the business can go bankrupt, the startup can dislodge employees, or the book can never become good enough to be published. There is risk in any of the directions we pick for our careers, but when do we take risks if not in our youth? When can we drop everything and jump with no net if not when we have minimal commitments, a desire for exploration and big drive? Or better, who has the guts of taking huge risks, if not a young person out of college?

So, for people who keep wondering why I quit my 9-to-5 corporate job to join a startup, after just 7 months, my answer is simple: time is the most precious value we hold. It is a loss of money to give up on that tiny bonus, financial and job stability, and safe prospects up the corporate ladder, to start as a beginner, but it is an even bigger loss of time to stay in a job that you do not enjoy. I might not value time strong enough now, but I do know that as I grow older and wiser, I will regret not utilizing every single moment of my life to the max. I will regret delaying decisions that should have been made quickly. But, I will cherish my ability to see the full picture and think long-term. Of course, quitting my stable job might prove to be a bad decision. I can end up really disliking the new job. The startup might also decline and I can remain with no job, no visa sponsorships, etc. But, I will figure it out. Because, I know that there is always a possibility to fallback. And this makes the return of this decision positive. Overall, the way I see it - there is zero probability of failure.

Goals and Happiness

I want to live my life to the fullest. I got out of college thinking that I want to make money. That money makes me happy. I forced myself every day to do something “productive” because I had a huge FOMO. I see graduation as a throw into the ocean of sharks of adult life, where I have to always work hard, fight those big waves, with the promise of making more money (especially more than my male fellow graduates) and being the first to found the most successful startup. I ended up really doing nothing. After work, I would sit in front of my computer and realize that all I wanted to do is watch movies and YouTube videos, while snacking the best chocolate. I had no drive to do anything other than consume food and indulge in trash entertainment. Was I feeling guilty about that? No! Was I complaining about it? Yes! Was I talking smoke and mirrors about my idealistic plans, out of which I executed zero ? Hell yes!

In a nutshell, my desire to do anything – other than killing time, and indulging myself in the pleasures of life, the metropolitan go-to-s, the checkboxes of what it means to have fun – was null. For the first months, I forced myself to learn chess - which was the only productive and successful hobby that I picked up. But I also forced my brain to think of startup ideas I was not excited about, that I thought would generate money. I forced myself to attend posh parties to meet people that I thought could expand my network, but my conversations with those people were shallow, uninteresting, and frankly far from the enriching intellectual conversations I was hoping for.